Reader Question
I have a strange problem. I am a musician who formally studied classical guitar and piano. When I am alone, I play well but when I play in front of people, I feel intimidated and don’t play my best. I have tried affirmations and ways to relax, be self confident, and so on, but nothing seems to work. Composing is my strong area not public performance. I do realize that it is my responsibility as a musician to overcome this problem and give a good performance to my audience. Do you know of any solutions to overcome this?
My Answer
- Mindset is everything. Performing in public is a skill that can be learned. Lots of people have overcome this fear and learned to feel comfortable – or even enjoy – performing in front of a crowd. You can too. It just takes practice.
- Don’t strive for perfection. You don’t have to be perfect. Your audience won’t crucify you if you make a mistake. Realize that their purpose is to enjoy themselves and have a good time, not criticize the entertainer. If you play original works, they probably won’t even realize you hit a wrong note or messed up your tempo.
- Take small steps. Start out with small groups of people first. As you become more comfortable and confident, play for larger crowds.
- Focus on your life purpose. If spreading your music is your life purpose, accept that you must overcome your fears to make this happen. Then, do whatever it takes to achieve this.
- Learn to laugh at yourself. Everyone makes mistakes. You can either beat yourself up about it or accept you aren’t perfect and laugh it off. Even if you have a terrible performance, you can always use it as a funny story to tell people when you are famous. “When I was just starting out, I was deathly afraid of performing in public. In fact, one time…” Own your mistakes so they don’t own you.
The only way I know to overcome a fear of public speaking is to make yourself do it over and over. As you practice, you will figure out what works for you and become more comfortable in front of people. Yes, at first, you will have anxiety towards this, but summon your courage to conquer this fear – and do it. The more you do it, the easier it will be.
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Yes, practice is the most important factor. If you just try public speaking or performing music 4-5 times, you’ll find out that your attitude has changed a lot. You see that not all people are interested, but you also get a positive feedback, which I think is the best motivation for the person on the stage.